Ice Queen

A guy in my college dorm called me this once. Not because I'm cold-hearted, but because I like winter. I actually like the idea of an ice age, because they never had to wonder whether they'd get snow for Christmas. That was mostly because they didn't have Christmas, but if they did, they could rest assured it would be white. I get really uptight about that. If we have a 60 degree day in December, it really bums me out; if I wanted a warm Christmas, I'd live in Florida. I moved to Boston largely because I wanted more snow, and I was tired of Marylanders whining about how much they hate it, and cancelling school every time the weatherman called for 3 inches.

I love sweaters. I love bundling up. I love having hot chocolate in front of a fire after your fingers and toes have gone numb from an hour of building snowmen. I love the way no one gets any work done just because there's a blizzard outside. I love the smells of burning wood and pine trees and baking chocolate.

The crazy thing is, I'm one of those women who's always cold. I have to carry a sweater around in summer to put on whenever I enter and air-conditioned building. Other people will be in T-shirts, and I'll have on two or three layers, and that's not an exaggeration. You'd never guess I had Scandinavian blood in me. I would have made a lousy Viking, saying things like, "OK, Sven, I can pillage for a while, but I'm really gonna wanna be home in a couple hours or my ears will hurt. This helmet provides no insulation."

Oh, speaking of which, I need a fashionable way to keep my ears warm. Now that I've been forbidden to wear my Elmer Fudd hats and my ear-band thing, and the other ear-cover thingy pinches my head, what's left? Most girl hats don't cover ears, and ears are my big problem. The enire sides of my head will ache because my ears get so cold. Why do girl clothes always have to be so uselessly cute? Why can't they keep you warm?

I'm kind of excited about some of the other stuff I get to wear now that the weather is getting chilly, though. I stole some items out of my Mom's closet, including this fake suede & fleece jacket from the early '70s (which I wear with my Muppet scarf) and a plaid wool poncho. I love plaid. Love it. Especially when it has both green and red. All Christmassy. And I have this smart cream and coral tweed Coach peacoat. That might not mean anything to you boys, but if you saw it you'd like it, I promise.

So here's to staying up late to watch the news, just to see if the temperature will drop below freezing. Here's to waking up to see frost on the grass and cars. Here's to coats so thick you can't put a purse over your shoulder. Here's to feeling like you achieved something just by making it back indoors after being outside for more than 5 minutes.

[Postscript: I just reread this post, and I think I have an answer to my own rhetorical question about why girl clothes don't keep you warm. They're meant to attract men who will keep you warm. OK, I get that. But he might think it's weird if I mostly want him to hold his hands over my ears.]